Tuesday, September 23, 2008

I"m done ....

Finished.... It's over - I quit!!
From this day forward I am resigning from my position as head laundress, chef, and chauffeur or better known as MOTHER!! Is there some paper I need to fill out somewhere? Do I need to seek proper legal representation to make this binding?

I don't know what ever possessed me to think I could pull this off, but I just obviously don't have what it takes to be the mother of these three deranged children. Obviously their headstrong and opinionated ways are a direct reflection of their exposure to too much time with their father! If I say the sky is blue, then someone is going to argue with me. If I ask someone to take a shower, then I'm going to hear 400 reasons why they don't want to take a shower and let's not even get started with teeth brushing! UGH! Go ahead... see if I care if all of your teeth fall out!!! I'm not the one that's going to be gumming my food!!

My 17 year old spoiled, ungrateful spawn has decided that she can live a better life living with her ungrateful spoiled 18 year old girl friend in HER parents' garage apartment. OH really now? Are you employed? Do you have any money? Can you even cook for yourself? Do you have any idea how much it costs to live on 'your own'? All of which this brat can answer a resounding 'NO'! See? What did I tell ya'... DERANGED!!! Oh by the way - on your way out - leave MY credit card that you use to put gas in your car with - on the cabinet.

I guess it's just too much for some kids to live in a new home where EVERYTHING is paid for and made available to them. Including college, clothes, food, and transportation? I guess I have really been a horrible mother? Go ahead... take all of your possessions (which I paid for) and move your happy little butt out.... (INSERT HUGE EYE ROLLING HERE)....

I didn't sign up for this drama. I certainly never created this for my parents - If I had, I can promise you I would have been picking my teeth up off of the floor! LOL

I am at the end of my rope with all three of my brats! Usually I like Briley, but lately she's turned into a little monster - is the moon in some weird phase? Are we having some sort of galactic imbalance? Can I sprinkle ground up happy pills in their food?

I've always heard the saying that "you're paying for your raising"... UH... I beg to differ - I'm obviously paying for someone else's raising because I guarantee I never acted like this - BUT my husband - well..... I guess the stories that his sisters told me were true, after all!
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